Wednesday, January 9, 2013

........"When will my Life Begin"

"And I'll re-read the books
If I have time to spare
I'll paint the wall some more
I'm sure there's room somewhere
And then I'll brush, and brush
And brush, and brush my hair
Stuck in the same place I've always been
And I'll keep wondrin'
And wonderin'
And wonderin'
And wonderin'
When will my life begin?"

This song is soooo funny.  It has been running through my head all week for some reason.  Maybe it's because Tangled is a regular at our house.  The words are a little dramatic and don't quite describe how I feel accurately, but as the new year starts,  I "Keep wonderin' when will our life begin."  I only feel that way because every single new year's eve Ben and I say to each other "2011 will be our year....2012 will be our year....Seriously I told him we were NOT saying anything to that effect this new years.  I look at  2013 as just another year of fun, happiness and endless trials.  If it's our year to finally "Begin" our life the way we hope then it is, if not, then.....at least we are all breathing, love eachother and together, right. :)
I know not everyone understands what seems like "endless" situations of our life, I mean I barely do, but this year I have decided to NOT necessarily think to myself "Not another year GRRRRR" but to think happy things happen every year even if it's just a few.  The kids are happy.  So for my own therapy I want to list all the Happy, Joyful things that happened in 2012.  I have been a true slacker at my blog so maybe this will help update everyone.
1.   In January Ben got that supervisor position. which came with a raise and a car.  That car saved our butts when mine died.
2.  In April my baby girl turned 1.
3.  In May we went to Disneyland for the first time with the kids, and had a blast
4.  In June I threw my first BIG birthday party for Brynlee.  Total success
5.  I love going to the 4th of July Parade's in Kaysville with the kids.
6.  Clinton Days parade was really fun for the kids (much much better then Roy's)  Holy Candy!
7. We went to the zoo many times with the kids.  Each time was a different experience.  They seemed to love it more and more.  My favorite was Kynzee's reactions.
8.  Despite the rough rough rough year it was for me personally,  I didn't die  :)
9.  Even though it hasn't helped our situation by helping us get a place of our own, I got a job
10.  We had a very nice Christmas for the first time in 10 years that we were able to do for our kids thanks to a bonus Ben received early.

Some of these happy things came with with sadness, but we are very grateful for being able to experience and feel some joy. 

1 comment:

Stephanie Dirks said...

I needed this post. I feel the same way sometimes. I look for a shining point in the distance without fully appreciating what I have glowing right next to me. I still can't believe Kynz is 1, almost TWO!! How crazy! Thanks for the reminder to live in the here and now and enjoy the journey!